Great Bowls of Fire

I am writing this post with burning eyes and blackening lungs. I knew this would happen sometime in the duration of dorm living. The first fire.

But let us back up.

Vanessa, Selene and I are in our dorm, talking and doing homework. V & I are making preparations to go to Nordstrom's Rack in a minute. Vanessa throws some Top Ramen in the microwave for a quick lunch before we leave to shop. It's instant Top Ramen in a paper cup where one just adds water.

Minutes pass and Vanessa returns to the microwave. She calmly says, "Why does this look like it's on fire?"

Selene and I, not really paying attention, laugh lightly and politely, and we go about our business.

Then Vanessa goes, "...because I didn't put WATER in the bowl!"

It WAS on fire.

She pressed cancel on the microwave, but hesitated to open it, for fear of what was to come.

I immediately stood on a chair and began fanning the smoke detector with a worksheet I'd been doing.

Selene readies a cup of water, and Vanessa opens the microwave. Instantly, a plume of smoke is released and engulfs our entire room.

Selene throws the water onto the flames and I continue fanning the smoke detector frantically. We open the door to the hall, but we don't want the HALL smoke detector to go off. It never does, though.

I ask for something else to fan with an Vanessa hands me a book. It works much better and succeeds at diverting the smoke.

On a funny/ironic note: the book that fanned away the smoke was Mere Christianity. C.S. Lewis saves the day again.

At this point I am coughing, and squinting through the smoke. Selene decides to peace out to go to class, and Vanessa has left the room to get some air.

Mind you, the cup of Ramen is still in the microwave.

Once I can't stand the smoke any longer, I leave the room and am greeted by some other girls on our hall who are laughing at us and asking what we cremated.

My friend Raechel from next door ventures in with me and we retrieve the burnt offering from the microwave. Here's what it looks like:

So then we put it in a plastic bag and take it outside.

I then Febreeze the room, but at this point, nothing can really conceal or overpower the smoke.

A bunch of girls leave to go to lunch, Vanessa included, leaving me to sit in the hallway while our room airs out. But now the whole hall smells like burnt toast and everyone who walks down our hall says to me, "What did you DO?"

"I didn't do anything," I say.

Then my default explanation to people walking by becomes: "I live with an arsonist."

"Don't to mean a narcissist?"

"Nope."

Then they smell the smoke and say, "Oh..."

So I'm thinking when I see Vanessa's boyfriend next time, I'll say: "Ernesto, marry her at your own risk. If you want her to make you dinner...you may regret it."

All jokes aside, I love Vanessa. Once I can breathe again, I will forgive her. ;)

The Older Brother

Out of all of the characters in the bible, I've always related to one more than any of the others:

The older brother in the parable of the Prodigal Son.

I feel like I've always had "older sister syndrome," as my friend Alex calls it. I asked her what that meant once and she described her own older sister--how she has just a natural instinct to be responsible and tell others what to do.

I see that in myself for sure.

When I read the parable of the Prodigal Son, I don't identify with the younger son. I have never gone and squandered my estate on wild living. I identify with the older brother. I have remained faithful--to my parents' expectations, to my own values, in my walk with God.

Maybe that's a prideful statement. Yes, I have stumbled, but I haven't done anything that has severely altered my walk with Him. I have abstained from drugs, alcohol, and sex. I have put so much effort into my walk with God, I have served others for Him, I have made a conscious effort to love others and live differently as a testimony to my devotion to God.

And yet I see God pour his blessings over people who constantly disobey Him. It bothers me.

It bothers me how my parents give my rebellious siblings anything they want, but push me to the side.

If I were around during this time, I would join the older brother when he walked away from his brother's party. I'd be like "dude, I totally know how you feel." And then we'd probably make out and go sheep-tipping.

Tonight at Rock Harbor, the pastor talked about this parable. One thing he pointed out was the part at the end where the older brother goes out into the fields when the party is going on in honor of his brother's return.

It says that the father went out to him. The phrase went-out in this Greek translation is the same one used when he describes how the father went out for his lost son. So it shows that even the obedient brother was lost. (This was also Jesus' way of telling the Pharisees that they were just as lost as the tax collectors and common people.)

The exchange in Luke 15 28:-32 is pretty fascinating:

"The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. ²⁹But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. ³⁰But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'

³¹" 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. ³²But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' "

The other thing he pointed out was that Jesus never says if the older brother comes back to the party. The story just ends. It's Jesus' way of telling the Pharisees that it's up to them, they can come to the party or just stand around moping.

He said that a lot of times we are like the older brother--we feel entitled and more important. Guilty.

I'm still bothered by how the younger brother becomes the star of the story. The story's even named after him. And then the older brother is regarded as the bad example. I don't think that's necessarily true. There are a lot of us older brother types out there. We have a lot to learn, I know. But sometimes I just feel like we are getting gypped.

Pray for my attitude there.

California Fashion

Today I went shopping because this next week holds a few events that I might want to look nice for :)

Tuesday night is Woo Fest. It's when the guys at Vanguard serve dinner to, sing for, and basically enchant the girls of Vanguard for a night. We're all supposed to dress up.

Then Saturday night is GYRAD, and I wanted to get a new outfit to wear for that. This will be my first date in THREE years! Ahh. So crazy. I don't even remember what to do on a date or how to act. Haha. I'm just not good at that stuff. And it doesn't help that my date is (from what I've heard) extremely gorgeous and apparently "looks like Sawyer from Lost."

I'm already going to be nervous, and now I'm in the midst of deciding what to wear and how to do my hair and...yeah.

I did find some clothes today, though. So I'll post some pictures here.

Here is my dress I got for Woofest. When I dress it up with accessories, I think it'll look dressier. Also, I may wear leggings. What do you think? It seems a little short to me. I dunno. I'm just not used to showing my legs, I'm still a bit insecure.

This is a jacket and jeans I got at Urban Outfitters. Not for the date, though, since I think the date is supposed to be nicer clothes.

This is called a "long shirt dress." It's pretty cool. I wear it with leggings, because without them it looks a little Risky Business ;)

This is another dress thingy I got. I have on black jeans under it, but I would probably wear it with leggings instead. I just don't think I'll go sleeveless to the date because it'll probably be chilly out and, once again, I'm insecure.

And...I couldn't resist. I bought a zip-up hoodie. In my defense, I needed one that was a neutral color :)

ALL IN ALL, I feel like I have a lot of pieces that my friends and I can work with in putting together an outfit. Vanessa and I are probably going to go shopping for accessories this coming week, so hopefully I'll have my "look" down.

How I'm going to do my HAIR for gyrad...I still don't know. But I will have plenty of help. Plenty of girls on my hall are hair-savvy and can practice prospective styles this week.

Pray for my nervousness. I really shouldn't be as worried as I am about how I'll look. It's just an inevitable part of being a girl who is going on a date. I want to make a good impression, but I still want to be myself.

If anyone has any suggestions about anything, let me know!

Why all the girls at Vanguard now want to date a baseball player...

I just thought I'd post this video for you guys.

Last night was our pep rally where all the teams came out to give an update and show themselves off.

The boys' baseball team is famous for never having a presentation or routine. Well, this year that changed. I think the video speaks for itself. Furthermore, these guys are the NEW baseball players (freshman and transfers) and they are usually the ones that the rest of the team and school looks down on. Let's just say they finally got a chance to prove themselves :) I love my school.

Boys Baseball from Ashley D on Vimeo.

(Guys who love Jesus are much more studly.

And the best way to get a gym full of girls to scream? Play 'Nsync, I guess.)

Then here's a video of the girls' softball team. We came to the rally to support Amanda on our hall. She's the one in the orange skirt and pink shirt. Anyway, their routine was great too. And the second half is cool if you've ever seen the movie White Chicks :)

(Girls who love Jesus are much cuter.)

Anyway, this is my awesome school. Fun fact: there are 233 palm trees on our campus.

And if you haven't already figured it out:

1. We dance a LOT here

2. I don't want to leave

Here are some updates which are also, inevitably, prayer requests as well:

-I am participating in National Novel Writing Month, which is--writing a novel (50,000 words or more) in November. So far I think I'm doing well with it.

On midnight on Halloween (so November 1st) I went to the "writing party" in the student center and hung out with everyone on campus who was participating. We started writing at 12am, and I only stayed about 2 hours but they had an all-nighter for anyone who wanted to stay longer.

I was the only person there who didn't have on a trench coat and/or medieval dress. Sometimes I forget that writers are weird and I don't necessarily fit the writer mold. They were all talking about online dragon games and all kinds of things that were over my head.

But I also forgot how much I love being in a room full of writers, writing together. It's so inspirational. And we can ask each other questions and ask for feedback. Writers are funny, too. These kids said the most witty, hilarious things that night.

So next time you watch The Office, remember that Steve Carell isn't funny. The WRITERS who write his script are funny. He's just a good actor.

-One of my friends on my hall, Raechel, read my book series I wrote (the 3 books- Take Cover, The Letter, and Breathless.) And she said she loved them and said I need to publish them. She knows a woman in Florida who just opened up a Christian publishing company and said she can give me her info.

I thought it was very sweet of her to say all that but I don't think those stories are good enough for publication. Or, if they are, I have LOT of work to do on them still. I feel like there's always room for improvement.

-Spring semester registration is approaching and I am trying to find a balance in getting in my core classes, my English major classes, and my Women's Studies minor classes. I feel a bit overwhelmed and a bit like I am going to be in school longer than I had planned. I also have some frustration with my school because they haven't yet added into their database my 2nd semester credits from CU Denver. So the computer still says I'm a freshman. Ha.

But I am meeting with my advisor tomorrow so I hope it gets all sorted out. Please pray.

-I am thinking about grad school (as should most junior-ish students) and I know I definitely want my master's degree in creative writing. NYU offers a creative writing grad program and it seems amazing. It's still at least 2 or 3 years away though, so I'm not going to fret over it yet because it's too much stress.

ONTO MORE FUN STUFF:

-I am kind of over the food here. Our caf is catered by a company called Bon Appetit and they are very good, but their food is very rich. So I'm ready to go home and eat what my mom always makes, you know?

Also, I've found that living in California means eating a ridiculous amount of Mexican food.

-Our GYRAD (Get Your Roommate A Date) event is Saturday November 21st. It's a big group date with our hall and the catch is that roommates get a date for each other. I, however, have 2 roommates who already have boyfriends so I don't have to find them anyone.

But apparently there is this big plan for ME that I was not aware of till recently. My roommate Vanessa's boyfriend has a close friend from church who she is thinking of setting me up with. He doesn't go to Vanguard, he's a couple years older, and apparently quite the catch.

My 3 other friends across the hall have seen his facebook and have all concluded that he is gorgeous. Blonde, I think, and very tall. I also know that he is a musician. That's all I know about him and Vanessa is vowing to keep quiet. I don't know his name or where he went to school or anything like that. So it's a little nerve-wracking knowing that I am getting set up with a mystery guy who is probably way out of my league. ha.

I am just hoping that GYRAD is a fun night and not too awkward nonetheless.

-On that note, I feel like everyone's question when I come back to visit will be: "Have you met anyone??"

And I'm going to go ahead and answer that question now. NO.

And if you must know WHY:

1. Because I am not in college with the intent of meeting my spouse. That's selfish and it undermines my educational aspirations.

2. Also because Vanguard guys are "afraid of girls." It's an old joke here apparently.

3. And finally, because--this is one of my life quotes--I don't like most guys and most guys don't like me.

I am much too picky. And my strong views, intelligence, and good looks all thrown together is extremely intimidating. I'm just sayin' ;)

-I absolutely love being in bible classes. I'm learning so much. In New Testament we are learning the parallels, and lack-there-of, in the 4 gospels.

Most scholars believe, with good reason, that the book of Mark was written first. My NT professor has a theory, and substantial evidence, that Mark was written first and the book of Mark was literally in front of the writer of the book of Matthew when Matthew was written. I think I believe him.

-I am going to start going to a young adult small group with my friend Tatiana. Hopefully I like it because I've had a hard time getting involved here.

-I went to both the girls and guys soccer games on Saturday. After watching so many of Emily's soccer games, I'm kind of over soccer. But I did have a good time and my face got tan.

-I ride my bike around town a lot and it's really fun. I just love the fact that the beach is right down the street and I can drive to Disneyland in 20 minutes if I want. :-D

-This Thursday night, our hall is dressing up in tacky prom dresses and going out to dinner at Norms (which is like village inn here.) Just another example of how crazy we are here.

-My agenda for tonight is so crazy. It goes: Invisible Children Documentary showing, Human Sexuality evening chapel, school comedy show, and then junior/senior broomball at the local ice rink.

Like I've said before, school is just something we do on the side here.

Here's a short, random video clip of my room and how everyone just likes to hang out in here. People come in my room all the time to talk, play taboo, play my guitar, or make snacks. I'm kind of a big deal.

Some Day, My Prince Will Come...

I just wanted to tell you guys about last night because it was great!

So Randy had to see a symphony for his music class. He chose the Disney one, and asked me to come. The tickets were expensive but he got them for us because he really wanted to see it.

The concert was in Los Angeles, meaning I'd have to drive myself because I didn't want him to go so far south twice and all that.

I bought a GPS this weekend because I'd really been stressing about driving to L.A. I got a TomTom brand and I must say I LOVE it. I recommend it for anyone who wants a GPS. I named her Mandy since it's a woman's voice.

Thanks everyone for your prayers, by the way. I was really psyched up about getting there.

I got all dressed up :) Pearls and all.

The drive there was fine. I missed one of my exits but Mandy got me back on track. It was really cool seeing the L.A. skyline out in the distance as I drove closer and closer.

I arrived at a Chipotle in L.A. and Randy met me there. He was dressed up too. We ate dinner, left my car there at the meter, and took his car up to the Disney Concert Hall.

We got there and got to our seats--which were amazing seats. They weren't the closest section but one section back from the closest and right in the center.

The symphony played Disney songs the first half like from Sleeping Beauty, Pirates of the Caribbean, and The Lion King. So beautifully done.

The the second half of the show they did the entire soundtrack of Snow White. They had singers/actors as well, and they stood in front of the symphony. There was Snow White, The Prince, the Queen, and the 7 Dwarfs.

It was truly epic. Magical. So much different than any musical/theatrical thing I've seen before.

Randy really enjoyed it too. I kept thanking him for deciding to do this and inviting me. He said he likes doing stuff like that with me (getting dressed up, going somewhere nice, etc) because it helps me remember what to expect from guys.

Very true. Randy's wife and little girls are going to get the star treatment, I can already tell.

I'm not ashamed to say that the best dates I've been on have been with my brother. He just GETS it when it comes to putting a girl on a pedestal. He likes to dress up often and go out, and I don't, but when I'm with him I feel like my attitude changes and I like feeling Princessy for a while.

As Snow White sang "Some day my prince will come" last night, I almost cried. One, because it was so beautiful musically, but also because the message of that song is a great reminder to girls. Some day, he WILL come. Being around Randy reminds me that there are is still chivalry and respect and the hope of a fairy tale.

After the concert Randy took me back to my car and we said our goodbyes and I love yous. I like having a brother in California.

The drive back home was very smooth and calm. Barely anyone was on the 405 so I wasn't stressed or scared, I just drove at my own pace, no radio, just my thoughts and Mandy's occasional instructions.

Very cool experience, all in all.

Peace and Blessings

First off, THANK YOU SO MUCH to Holly, who designed my new blog! Isn't it awesome?! I guess this means I am a legit writer now. One step closer to being famous, right?

Secondly, just wanted to throw some prayer requests out there:

-That I get my schoolwork done on time and don't procrastinate

-That I find a way to volunteer somewhere and get involved with a small group at a church

-That this weekend when my mom and sisters come see me we have an amazing time

-That God gives me new ideas for stories, as I feel like I always need to be working on something, you know? I have to keep writing so I don't lose any talent or slack too much

-That I stay healthy in body and mind as I change so rapidly

-Discernment in who I spend time with (guys and girls)

-That I get more comfortable and confident with driving in California. Also for safety when I do.

-More amazing experiences

Sorry, I didn't plan on sounding too demanding. I guess there was just a lot.

Some updates:

-One of my roommates is Puerto Rican, the other is Mexican, so I am basically a Spanish whiz now. The three of us speak in spanish to each other in our room about 75% of the time. It's fun.

-I've gotten A's on all of my tests so far (pray it stays that way!)

-I have decided to minor in Women's Studies! Yay!

-I am working on my people-pleasing problem. One of my professors, who is a therapist, suggested Harriet Braiker's book The Disease to Please. I am reading it now. Hopefully I will stop apologizing all the time. Ha.

-I wear my hair curly all the time now. I'm sure you're all happy about that. Yes, I finally caved.

-I have gotten involved in the Live 2 Free club at school, which is an anti-human trafficking/anti-domestic violence/women's rights club. It's really awesome so far.

-I am thinking about doing a summer internship with XXX Church. If you haven't heard of them, check out their website. It's an amazing ministry. The internship would mean that I would get to go into strip clubs and brothels and do ministry and just love the women there. But it would also mean that I would have to spend all summer in Las Vegas (hot!) and I'd miss everyone.

So pray for me as I try and decide where God wants me this summer. Check out this site and watch the video for a preview of what I'd be doing: stripchurch.com

-And finally, I have a new obsession. There's a guy on youtube who calls himself ShayCarl. He is making a video of every day of his 29th year. He is really funny and his wife and kids are so cute. He's pretty obnoxious but he doesn't cuss or anything and it's all just cute, family fun. So if you ever need a "reality show" to watch/get addicted to, go here: youtube.com/user/SHAYTARDS

My personal favorite vlog so far is the one titled "broken nose." Check it out.

I love you all and miss you! If you ever want to call me or video chat me or whatever, please do!